Category: Americas

2017: a heart opening year

[Português]

Days before I start a new year of my life, I’m finally able to finish this post looking back at 2017 and the lessons I’ve learned from months of traveling, experiencing, settling, working, and getting to know me better – and feeling comfortable with it 🙂

2017 was the year I (re)opened my heart and allowed love to flow (in and out) again. After surviving 2016 (how tough it was!), and traveling east, 2017 surprised me with lovely encounters with places, people, and experiences.

It was January 11th when I felt it was going to be a different year.

It was raining and I had been awake since 5am to catch the first of 3 buses of that day. I was extremely lucky that my travel  partner decided, last minute, to continue her trip with me. Because when crossing the border I realized we’d swapped passports by mistake. I had hers, she had mine, and despite the same nationality we don’t look anything alike [another lesson learned from the road].

I can’t imagine how 2017 would have been if I was not able to cross to Laos on that January 11th. I wouldn’t have met the Mekong, nor the weavers of Xamtai, nor started a new habit, nor improved my motorbike skills, nor enjoyed sunsets and the best hash browns at the border with Cambodia. I’d probably have had a different experience in Northern Thailand, skipped Songkran (the water festival), and most important not met all the incredible people along the way.

If 2015 was the year I was forced to embrace uncertainty and deal with it without time to think or breath, and 2016 was when I embraced it and tried to add some structure to it (at least in my thinking), 2017 was when I allowed myself to live it beautifully, to enjoy the uncertainty of the paths I chose, and to experiment without fear of failing.

I spent 3 months in Laos, visited Northern Thailand, spent almost one month back in the US – covering both coasts and a bit of Louisiana and Mississippi -, introduced my mother and brother to one of my favorite spots in the world – where he indulged himself with all kinds of bugs and weird food – and had a blast having them visit my Thai family, and flew back to Brazil for a work project.

Being back in Sao Paulo after 7 years away was an interesting experience, to say the least. I reconnected with old friends, made new ones, and was able to keep feeding my nomadic soul hopping from one house to the other, thanks to the generosity of friends who are more than family to me, until I found a perfect short-term place where I spent the last 5 months of the year.

2017 also taught me that sometimes the right people come into our lives at the wrong time, and there’s nothing we can do about it other than enjoy their company while it lasts. It also taught me that there are wrong people out there, and sometimes we have encounters with them right when we need to learn a few lessons.

It was also a year of love in terms of acceptance.

Acceptance of who and how I am. Of the fact that I don’t have a standard answer to the question “what do you do” or “where’s your home”. I understood that not having a standard answer to questions like these does not mean I don’t do the things I do with professionalism and passion, nor it means I don’t feel home in the places where I am. Regardless of what people might think (and judge), I know that I’m an excellent professional, daughter, sister, and friend who will always be there for the people I love and for the exciting and challenging projects that come along.

Bring on 2018!

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Um início e um fim

Toda jornada nova se inicia com um fechamento. No meu caso, o início da minha aventura pela Ásia marca o fim de um ciclo de três anos morando nos Estados Unidos, mais exatamente em Boston, de onde sentirei muitas saudades.

Acho simbólico que para chegar à Ásia eu tive que atravessar os EUA de leste a oeste; como se eu só pudesse me despedir depois de apreciar a fascinante geografia norte-americana pela janelinha do avião.

Ainda mais simbólico dizer o primeiro “oi” e ao mesmo tempo “tchau” para o Oceano Pacífico do lado das Américas e assistir a um último pôr-do-sol antes de voltar para o aeroporto de Los Angeles. O sol se pondo é, para mim, a expressão perfeita de impermanência. O sol é sempre o mesmo, mas cada pôr-do-sol é diferente, as cores e formas nunca se repetem. O meu último pôr-do-sol americano ficará na minha lista de favoritos, até que eu possa voltar para esse país que me surpreendeu positivamente e ganhou minha admiração e carinho; onde eu me senti em casa pelos últimos três anos e onde eu aprendi tanto sobre mim mesma.

Quando os planos mudam e as coisas não acontecem conforme gostaríamos, cada pessoa reage de uma forma. A minha parece caótica para quem está ao meu redor, incapacitado de adentrar à minha cabeça e acompanhar os zilhões de pensamentos que tomam conta dela. Mas eu gosto de pensar que minha reação não é caótica, e sim caórdica (caos + ordem, ou ordem no caos). Quando as coisas não seguem conforme planejado minha primeira reação é pânico. Depois do susto inicial, eu ativo minhas ferramentas de sobrevivência psicológica e começo a fazer uma lista com centenas de possibilidades, desenho cenários, exploro opções e sempre, sempre, tenho um plano B. Na maior parte do tempo eu faço tudo isso em voz alta – o que faz com que quem está ao meu redor pense que meu modus operandi seja o caos, quando na verdade eu estou apenas exercitando minhas habilidades de organização mental 🙂 . Quando eu decidi abraçar a incerteza e me abrir para o inesperado, eu já estava trabalhando num plano B. Agora, esse plano virou plano A: explorar o sudeste asiático!

Por que o sudeste asiático? Principalmente porque eu não sabia quanto dinheiro eu seria capaz de juntar durante um ano. Minha outra opção seria voltar para meu país natal, mas meu coração e intuição me empurravam para o lado oposto. Depois de pesquisar um pouco não foi difícil concluir que o sudeste asiático seria umas das regiões mais baratas para viajar e explorar. Essa foi, portanto, a razão número um.

A segunda razão tem a ver com o fato de que eu sou extremamente sortuda e abençoada (e por isso sempre grata!) em ter amigos espalhados por esse mundão. Alguns desses queridos estão na Tailândia, em Myanmar, Bangladesh e Índia. Comecei então a procurar voos para esses destinos. O preço da passagem dos EUA para a Tailândia foi imbatível (USD 520).

A outra razão para escolher tal destino é porque eu sou apaixonada pelo mundo e pelas diferenças – sobretudo culturais – que existem de uma região a outra. Até agora, meu conhecimento do mundo é praticamente restrito às Américas e à Europa. As línguas que eu falo são línguas clássicas do ocidente. Além das diferenças, eu também estou ansiosa para descobrir similaridades entre o sudeste asiático e a América Latina.

Eu estou animada com essa jornada que se inicia. Uma aventura que jamais seria possível se não fosse por planos que mudaram, pela decisão de aceitar que a vida é feita de incertezas e por ter me permitido viver as experiências que vivi durante a jornada que se encerrou com o pôr-do-sol na Califórnia em 26 de setembro de 2016. Onde isso tudo vai me levar? Boa pergunta!

Vamos descobrir juntos.

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Curiosidades sobre minhas poucas horas na China – em solo ou no avião:

  • Nenhum website ligado ao Google funciona. Obrigada Air China por me avisar que não mandaria minha passagem para meu endereço do Gmail!
  • Fidel não morreu. Jornal da manhã mostra reportagem de cerca de 7 minutos sobre viagem de delegação Chinesa a Cuba. Fotos foram tiradas. Várias mostrando Fidel, inclusive com close-ups.
  • A bordo da Air China as opções para janta são rice ou noodle? Para almoço só pork rice ou duck rice. Gotta love rice ❤
  • Capacete de segurança do limpadores de janela é trançado! ❤ ❤

 

[Escrito em 28 de setembro de 2016, no aeroporto de Pequim.]

Every journey starts with an ending

Beijing Int’l Airport – September 28, 2016

Every journey starts with an ending.  In this case, the beginning of my journey to Asia marks the ending of three years living in the USA, more particularly in the Boston area, a place I’ll dearly miss.

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Goodbye Boston!

I find it symbolic that in order to fly to Asia I had to cross North America from coast to coast, as if I could only say goodbye after appreciating its fascinating geography from my window seat. Even more symbolic to say hi and goodbye to the Pacific Ocean from the American side, and have a chance to watch a last sunset before heading back to LAX airport. For me sunsets are the perfect expression of impermanence. The sun is always the same, but every single sunset is difference. I’m happy to say my last sunset in the USA – for now –  will remain as one of my favorites until I have a chance to come back to the country that surprisingly grew on me, where I felt home for the past three years, and where I learned so much about myself.

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Santa Monica, LA, CA.

When plans fall apart and life doesn’t go as planned people react in very different ways. The way I react might seem chaotic to all of those whose are not inside my head (another way of saying everyone else), but I like to think that it’s not chaotic, it is chaordic (chaos+order). When things don’t go as planned first I panic, then I activate my “MRB’s psychological survival kit” and start brainstorming hundreds of possibilities, draw multiple scenarios, explore various options, and I always, always, have a plan B (most of the times I do that out loud. So I do understand why some people think I’m chaotic. I apologize for that). When I decided to embrace uncertainty and to be open to the unexpecte, a plan B was being shaped and I was studying it carefully. Now plan B is plan A: let’s explore Southeast Asia!

Why SE Asia?

Mainly because I did not know how much money I would be able to save during one year. My other option would be to go back to my home country but my heart and intuition kept pushing me away from it – and the political and economic crisis did not help either. After doing some research it was not hard to conclude that SE Asia would be one of the cheapest destinations, and this was the number one reason for that.

The second reason is not hard to guess. I’m lucky enough to have amazing friends spread all over the world, some of which are in Thailand, Myanmar, India, and Bangladesh. The initial search for flights considered the first three destinations. The price to get to Thailand flying from California was unbeatable (USD 520).

Lastly, I’m fascinated about the world and all the differences one can find from one region to another. Most of my worldly knowledge and experience is related to the Americas and Europe. The languages I speak are pretty much classic western languages. And although very different in terms of culture, I want to see with my own eyes if there are similarities between SE Asia (probably other places in Asia too) and Latin America.

I am super excited about the journey that starts now. An adventure that could never be possible if it weren’t for plans falling apart, for embracing uncertainty, and for allowing myself to live through all the experiences I’ve lived during the journey that ended with that sunset in California on September 26 2016.

Where is it going to take me? Let’s find out!

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Where did September 27 go?

Last things I remember about September 27:

  • I’m sitting outside a gate at LAX airport
  • I’m trying really hard to stay awake. I woke up at 5am in Boston. Now it’s 1am in LA, meaning 4am in Boston. I’ve been awake for 23 hours.
  • Don’t sleep! Boarding is almost starting.
  • Onboard Air China flight to Beijing.
  • Chinese are loud. Comparing to Americans, with whom I spent most of the past 3 years. I guess Brazilians are loud too. I forgot about that.
  • It’s around 2:30am, and I’m probably still flying over the US.
  • My eyes close. They are heavy. Tired.
  • The plane suddenly smells like Chinese food. Should I open my eyes and eat? It’s a 12 hours flight… No. Eyes closed again.

All of a sudden it’s September 28.

I’m in China.

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